Remembrance Photography - Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep | Boise Newborn Photographer

I was just wrapping up my work day when I got a text from the regional dispatcher for Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep - a nonprofit organization that I volunteer for as a photographer. Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep provides remembrance photography to grieving families who have suffered from stillbirth or pregnancy loss.

Several other members of the volunteer team had already responded that they were unavailable. I was available, so I accepted the session and headed over to the hospital. The same hospital where my son was born and had his stay in the NICU. Yes, I still get triggered when I walk in those hospital doors. But, this is part of my healing journey.

I volunteer for Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep because, while my birth experience and time in the NICU was traumatic, I was fortunate enough to bring my baby home. I can’t even begin to imagine the grief of parents who are experiencing the loss of their child. It’s not fair. The loss of a baby must feel like the future has been stolen, like there is nothing to hope for anymore. It’s absolutely devastating. And yet, it happens much more frequently than anyone wants to recognize.

I showed up to the hospital to photograph beautiful newborn baby Emory, who was born at 37 weeks 5 days. I don’t know any of the details surrounding the loss of this precious baby girl, but I know that she was loved. Her family was so sweet and inspiring. Both sets of grandparents were there with the parents in the “butterfly room”. While they were obviously grieving, you could tell how much love was there in that room and they also seemed at peace. The family was so kind and so thankful that I was there to take photos for them - but all I can ever think is “it’s the least I can do”. Because, if there is anything I can do to help lessen the grief, or help these families along on their healing journey, that’s what I’m doing this for.

While I can’t share any of the photos from my portrait sessions with Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep, for privacy reasons, here is a photo I took of a baby doll in my kitchen, with a blanket draped over the high chair, practicing a lighting technique for these types of sessions.